Dealing with cheating spouse often causes people to doubt whether they can save their long term relationship or marriage from ending up in a mental hospital, a divorce court or a harsh breakup! There is a lot of stress involved with the decision and it comes with great struggle just o make it through the day.
While it is really unfortunate when someone is faced dealing with a cheating partner but the truth is that not in all cases, you are going to leave or ruin the relationship. There are ways that can help you repair your relationship and restore your faith in your partner. Let us have a glance at some of the ways that can help you overcome this stressful situation as well as manage a cheating spouse.
Here is a quick guide that tells you the positive ways in dealing with cheating spouse:
Let your partner end the affair:
Your partner may or may not feel emotionally attached to the other person they are having an affair with, and in some cases, they might truly believe that they are in love with the other person. It’s the time when your marriage or beloved relationship requires a new start and you can never start a new start until the time your partner is in attachment with someone else. You need to ask them to end their affair right then and don’t let the door open for them to take a time to end the affair.
Help them get over it!
If you are truly into your partner, whether girlfriend, boyfriend, husband or wife and don’t want to end up in divorce, then you need to help your partner and life get back on the track. While you are tormented and struggling with getting over hurt, anger, jealousy and depression, if you are careful you might end up creating a wall of barrier between you and your spouse. While you are feeling like killing your partner from inside for such heinous act, it is best to control your emotional turmoil and say things or act as there is a hope left for renewal.
5 Keys to Save your Relationship while you are dealing with the cheating partner:
Never make a decision on whether you have liked to stay or leave until you have faced and expressed all your emotions including disappointment and resentment.
Make a clear list and statement to your partner what would be required in order to make you stay.
Take proper care of yourself and have complete food and sleep. While we all tend to get depressed and stressed at such time, but remember, don’t let an affair ruin your health and life. This is not the only phase of your life and after few years of your life, you will either be happily married to your spouse or maybe someone else.
Determine what needs to be done to make you forgive and re-trust your partner. He or she has broken your heart and promises. It will take some time to heal those wounds but it is necessary to see beyond today. See what it will take for you to restart and forgive.
Don’t try to place unrealistic demands on your cheating partner. Though he might truly have screwed up but you must be respectful when it comes to dealing with them. Instead of overreacting, analyze and assess their looks, act, gestures and conversation.
If you are highly hurt and feeling like the end of the world then it will be tough to forget and forget, but not impossible. Do not get driven by your friend’s advice or intimidated by the negative stuff you read here and there about the odds of restoring a relationship. Nothing else matters more than you and your spouse, whether you both are going and willing to stay together or not. If you feel and believe that your marriage is worth saving, only for you then you can turn it around.
How to confront a cheating partner?
When you become aware of the affair, it is a heartbreaking moment. Being cheater is unacceptable, for all! However, not all the times it is easy to confront and get the truth out of their mouth. If you have come across such truth and want to confront them then you need to learn these 5 tips (don’ts of confronting your cheating spouse)
Do not endanger your life:
You know your partner at best and if he or she is abusive then be cautious when you confront them. If you know if your spouse can become violent and physically abusive on bringing such issue then make sure to accompany a close friend or relative with yourself. While it is a great chance to get out of abusive relationship, if he/she starts shouting then get out of the house and move away.
Don’t do it alone
Having someone by your side is a safe bet on dealing with such issues. You never know if they will become angry or try to shut you up forcefully. It is also that while they might be loving and caring other times, seeing getting themselves caught might make them feel insecure and over react.
Do not confront in front of their friends or your kids
Confronting in front of their friends or you kids is a big no. It is unfair to drag them into a messy relationship as they can understand what you are actually talking about and for kids, it can be detrimental to their psychological development. For friends, it might be embarrassing for your spouse and may fill them with hatred and anger.
Don’t confront without Solid Proofs
If you have just heard the rumors about your partner’s cheating deeds but you are not having any solid evidence about it then it is better not to confront it yet. Gather the possible proofs first for example hotel bills, credit card details, long missing hours, unknown vacations, or anything. You can also try to hire a professional investigator if you can afford one. The primary thumb rule is to never jump to the conclusion results as in the case, if they are not cheating you then such accusations will only break up the healthy relationship.
Make a plan in mind, if you don’t have one
If you have gathered enough proof that your spouse is cheating on you and you are ready to confront but wait, have you made a plan to confront them? Are you ready to live them in the same house once you have come to know about their cheating? If you are a parent then you need to plan everything according to them. Think what is going to happen to them? Unless you have a plan to salvage the relationship and ready to listen to the explanation of your partner, make sure that you know where you are going once you have exposed them.
The above mentioned 5 things are a must to remember what you should not do while dealing with such delicate matters. You can further seek expert help from Cheating Spouses Website where several similar cases are being reported and the outcomes are well mentioned. It is your relationship and you have invested a lot of love, emotions and time in it. Don’t let it fade away that quickly!