Lust, obsession or infatuation whatever is the reason; if you have become part of infidelity it’s not going to pay you in good. It will spoil your nuptial bond for sure. Usually, infidelity accounts for divorce in most of the marriages. But before both the partner decides to separate themselves, it is necessary that they understand the reason behind it. Poor communication, lack of endeavours to resolve the issues due to ego clashes, lack of intimacy and financial constraints are some of the major causes of the breakup.
At this time marriage counselor comes into the picture. He talks to the husband and wife and tries to turn a threatened relationship into a soothing one. These are qualified advocates that have done intensive studies and have loads of experience in solving such issues. Their tips and tools help save the marriage.
If you have broken the bond of trust and want to maintain your relationship now, here are 5 ways by which you can safeguard your wedding bond.
- They should talk to the marriage counselor and work on the grounds of infidelity:
The cheating spouses should talk to their counselor and discuss the issues of the husband-wife relationship in details. They should confront and accept their blunder wholeheartedly. At this point, the counselor carries the conversation with both the partners separately understanding the gravity of the situation. He makes the offended spouse understand that the situation arouses because of the blaring reasons and it hampered the relationship. The questions asked by the marriage counselor will make both the partner realize their pitfalls. Counselling greatly assists in building the relationship and turns even a divorce case into a healthy relationship.
- Cheating spouse can discuss their issues with the counselor without bringing it to the notice of their wife:
They call it a safe place to discuss their emotions. They understand the severity of their affair and do not want to hurt their spouse’s emotions at the same time. Getting the full confidence of the counselor, they try to work out a solution comfortably. They also discuss various ways by which they can come out of their lover’s trap. On the other hand, they also talk to the counselor regarding maintaining their relationship till the end. By contacting a professional counselor who works with moral obligations and does not disclose any secrets to his wife is the best solution that a cheating spouse can get.
- Cheating spouses discusses the processing of their emotions with the counselor :
Marriage counselors offer remarkable solution-oriented outcomes. By discussing the culprit’s emotions, anger, anxiety, happiness, sadness, excitement etc, they try to understand their physical, mental and emotional state. Thereafter they bequeath them with effective strategies as in what to do under such circumstances. Thereafter they can work with their emotions and then take the decision regarding their marriage. The questions would be categorized under two sections-
- What are his expectations from the marriage?
- How would the culprit feel if the marriage is broken?
- Will the affair be successful in giving the culprit everything that he expects from his current marriage?
- How will he feel after his marriage is broken?
- Will he be able to connect with his existing lover?
- Counselor assists the cheating spouse with the next plan of action:
If the affair is limited up to infatuation or lust only, marriage will break. But if the affair is more than that and cheating spouse wants to live with both the relations forever, then the counselor guides the cheating spouse with the future outcomes in terms of family health, his personal health and the social outcomes discussing the deep consequences of the case. To figure out the things in a better way, the counselor teaches the culprit with the effective steps for taking their wedding beyond the affair while making the knot of marriage stronger.
- Counselor also assists the cheating spouse to prevent any affairs in future:
Some spouses have a tendency to get attracted to people of opposite sex very soon. Though they understand the consequences of the situation well, but can’t stop their urge for lust or infatuation. A professional and well-experienced counselor assists the cheating spouses with a myriad of remedies.
The counselor may suggest following remedies-
- He talks to the culprit’s wife.
- He talks to the husband and discusses all the matters in details as in how often he wants to have sex with his wife?
- Why does he not feel the attraction for his wife?
- What special qualities he sees in his lover? Is it finance or sexy appeal?
- What if his wife leaves him?
If you are also entangled in any such trap, discuss the matter with a qualified professional on time before your marriage wrecks.